Resisting

You can ask people where you want, more and more feel overwhelmed: by world politics, eco grief, or the feeling of acceleration by social media. I searched for solutions and want to talk about different approaches. Including links for further inspirations.

Some days ago, a friend told me that she has started a psychotherapy out of pure defiance. She had previously said to her doctor that she felt extremely exhausted and could no longer escape the vicious circle of being afraid of the world. Really bad fear. “What are you afraid of?”, asked a doctor. She answered: “Of Putin, of Trump, of our next elections, what they destroy in the world.” The doctor laughed at her: “How can you be so afraid of Putin, he is far away from you!” Yes, this was a bad doctor, but fortunately the moment for my friend to search for a shrink. And she came back from her first session with a smile: “He said that I’m not alone! And that it was good to leave this doctor because she had nothing better to do than laughing at my fears.”

Take People Seriously

Never laugh at someone who tells you that the world and the conditions surrounding politics, nature, and the climate feel scary. Never minimise fears, because people in the middle of a bomb attack would “have much greater fears”. Never dismiss fears because someone superficially seems to be well and “doesn't even have to starve”. Fears are first and foremost a very real feeling that can't be reckoned up against one another. And so it’s with grief, whether you have lost a relative or are mourning an extinct species.

• Wikipedia: Eco Grief (S'ouvre dans une nouvelle fenêtre)

• Sostalgia and Mourning (S'ouvre dans une nouvelle fenêtre)

Skiers can perhaps imagine how my girlfriend feels: snowfall has piled up, completely wild and in dangerous places. And then the entire slope threatens to go down in an avalanche. Who wouldn't throw themselves helplessly to the ground? Perhaps it is a problem of our time that we like to downplay or rationalise away other people's fears and emotions. But at the end of the day, you'll end up with the same diarrhoea in your pants whether you wet yourself because of a fear of heights on a school trip or because of a real drone attack.

And extremist parties are only too happy to jump into this vacuum of feeling helpless: they promise simple solutions. It sounds as easy as in a cult: someone is made the scapegoat. And then they promise that you will never have diarrhoea again if you drive away this scapegoat or worse. As long as you can think clearly, you know that one day you will have diarrhoea again. But you can do something yourself. For example, seek professional help to combat your fears, not scapegoats. Talk to friends about your emotions. And above all, don't neglect the side of yourself that isn't constantly afraid, but also experiences beautiful things. Extremists try to destroy this side - this is how they gain power over you.

• Mental Health Foundation: Some Every Day Coping Ideas (S'ouvre dans une nouvelle fenêtre)

• The Conversation: Feeling Political Distress? (S'ouvre dans une nouvelle fenêtre)

• The Catalyst: Coping With Political Anxiety (S'ouvre dans une nouvelle fenêtre)

• Scientific American. How To Cope In The USA (S'ouvre dans une nouvelle fenêtre)

Stop Doom-Scrolling

Then we have another extreme, the so-called doomers, for whom the apocalypse is already a foregone conclusion. In their eyes, even the skier’s mountain is about to crumble. You know these people from social media: They cannot find the slightest shred of hope and may even become aggressive if you succeed in doing so. Their arguments are often characterised by hatred of ‘humanity’, whose imminent extinction is supposedly already inevitable. Some even believe that the planet would explode in the very near future.

In doing so, they forget that their arguments have two major problems: First of all, self-hatred. Their arrogance towards humanity should not obscure the fact that they are part of it. So are they somehow complicit? If humanity is evil - they are part of the evil. If this situation gives them satisfaction, it would be time to seek professional help.

The second problem: Conjuring up the apocalypse is worse than helplessness. Doing so you paralyse yourself and others by doing nothing and giving up on yourself and the planet. It can be also damned comfortable to have such a great excuse for inactivity! But can we get out of this vicious circle?

• Katharine Hayhoe: Giving up is too comfortable (S'ouvre dans une nouvelle fenêtre)

Connect

My friend did the first important step: She overcame her unease and her shame, and talked about it. It seems so easy and can be so hard: what will my friends say? Will they laugh at me like that doctor? She talked about it and we didn’t laugh. Like her shrink, we could tell her: you are not alone. We talked hours about our fears and confusion, and felt that something had changed. A feeling as if we had liberated ourselves to act together. Talking about that tabu felt like empowering us.

The end of this article is unplanned. Again, we had bad news today: Dr Jane Goodall has passed away. But she died as it was her greatest wish told in a Guardian interview:

“I’m not going to give in. I’ll die fighting, that’s for sure.”

Therefore I give you the link of an article (2022) I wrote about her and Margaret Atwood as role models in a time of multiple crises. With that article, you find my favourite links to interviews with her. What she says is meant to encourage. Imagine if you shared more quotes from people like her than from wannabe-dictators!

Her words have lost none of their relevance. She was a truly great woman.

My article (also for listening): Polyplurimetacrisis – where’s your brake? (S'ouvre dans une nouvelle fenêtre)

(S'ouvre dans une nouvelle fenêtre)